Longtime face of the Jessica Simpson Collection® Jessica Simpson has been sharing much of her married life with the public lately. This weekend, she displayed an otherwise private moment of consensual spanking on Instagram, and last night, she posted the above photo of another date night with her husband, former NFL tight end Eric Johnson.

Jessica Simpson's husband probably thinks he's doing pretty well in the marriage department at this current juncture. But let's look closely at this photo.

  1. Jessica Simpson is on her phone, looking bored, on date night.
  2. Jessica Simpson captioned the photo "Come On Baby, Light My Fire..."—a clear message to Jessica Simpson's husband.
  3. Jessica Simpson's husband has instead drawn an elaborate portrait of an insane woman on the table with crayons.

Is Jessica Simpson's husband aware that this is a nice restaurant? Does he remember what Jessica Simpson requested, which was to go on dates more and do adult things like see Fifty Shades of Grey? And act out some of the parts at home? And not draw on the table with crayons????

Message to Jessica Simpson's husband: Grow up.