Sure, you think your feet are pretty nice. But would those expensively pedicured toes pass metatarsal muster with Hollywood's premiere foot-fetishizing auteur? Selfless talk-show diva Tyra Banks might give you the opportunity to find out:

Tyra Banks Show: Sexy Feet?
Do you have sexy feet?

Would you like your feet to be judged by Quentin Tarantino?

Are you America's Next Top Foot Model?

If so, please contact Michelle ASAP at 866-xxx-xxxx or email her at xxxxx@yahoo.com

Tarantino's the "Foot Fucking Master" (note the very important absence of hyphen between the first two words in that title, which would indicate a more complicated kind of fetish), a true below-the-ankle aficionado who has on more than one occasion splashed towering love notes to Uma Thurman's perfect feet across multiplex screens, so please make sure that everything's been well-moisturized and assiduously pumiced before even thinking about giving Tyra's staff a call. The man can spot the beginnings of a bunion a month before it finally emerges.

• Tyra Banks Show: Sexy Feet? [Craigslist]

Contact information for this author is not available.