• Jada Pinkett Smith says that she and husband Will keep their sex life spicy by going to parties at people's houses and sneaking off for a quick bang in the host's bedroom or closet or bathroom. Is this a Scientology thing? [Sun]
  
  
• Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson broke up again because they got into a huge fight over Nicole Ritchie, of all people, because Ritchie invited Ronson to a party but insisted that Lohan could not come with her. [DListed]
  
  
• Victoria Beckham recently had her third boob job, this time to reduce the ridiculous lady-mounds she enlarged so she'd fit in with the locals when she and the family moved to LA. [Daily Mail]
  
  
• No, Owen Wilson isn't hung up at all on Kate Hudson. He just dates a woman who look exactly like her, which of course will cause all of us to gossip and speculate endless that he is actually hung up on her. [Gatecrasher]
  
  
• Judd Apatow confirmed what many people have probably been thinking for quite some time—He is utterly horrible in bed. [Page Six]
  
  
• Larry David loves New York for its distinct smell of urine and because it's virtually impossible to get someone to give you change for a ride on the bus. [Starpulse]
  
  
• Former New York Giant defensive end Michael Strahan is engaged to Eddie Murphy's ex-wife Nicole. [Daily News]
  
  
• Amy Winehouse's amazingly astute parents think that all of Amy's drinking might have the potential to, you know, kill her! [Sun]
  
  
• Why does Megan Fox hate children who attempt to give her flowers? [DListed]
  
  
• Guy Ritchie is enjoying the single life in London now that he's rid himself of that addicted to African adoptions wife of his. [Daily Mail]
  
  
• Britney Spears took a break from terrorizing London's nightlife to take her kids to the zoo over there. [Sun]
  
  
• In honor of his dead friend, Johnny Depp has named a beach on his private island after Heath Ledger. [Mirror]

• Aniston was in Germany promoting her sad little dog movie, Marley & Me, with her sadsack costar Owen Wilson, doing sad things like eating dog biscuits for the shrieking delight of strangely-dressed Europeans. Jen then volunteered to get down on all floors and eat poop if it meant that everyone would love her again, but the German people—always kind, always understanding—put her to sleep instead. [NYDN]
• Was Rihanna's World's Worst Fan Chris Brown canoodle-dancin' with big-butted Kim Kardashian's probably also big-butted sister Khloe in Miami? That's what E! thought yesterday. Turns out they were wrong. When asked if she was in fact cutting rugs with the ruined crooner, Khloe said she'd never met him, but then begged and pleaded for the cameras and news reporters to stay while she twirled her dress and batted her eyelashes and a cold rain fell on Miami. [P6]
• Katie Holmes wants you to stop saying horrible things about Suri, she's just a child after all, and you should stop paying attention to her, she recently told Glamour magazine in a cover-story interview. [Us]
• Madonna's little Brazilian youth sex-outreach project, Jesus Luz, fingered his nose at Madonna's ex-lover Alex Rodriguez by wearing a Yankees cap when he went to Maddy's Kabbalah center in New York. Fearing embarrassment, though, Jesus had Madonna drop him off a block away from the center so his friends wouldn't see that she drove him. [Us]
• Ugly, stupid bitch Gisele Bundchen, some sort of stupid dummy model, has gone and snarled her snake-y talon claws into America's Greatest Hero, noble-but-wounded New England Patriots quarterback Thomas Edward Brady, Jr. She'll be the step-mother to Brady's child, born by the wicked, minnowy actress Bridget Moynahan, who must have done something terrible to make this noble God of Truth, Justice, and Bedroom Eyes to treat her the way he did. A nation mourns. [Showbiz Spy]
• Britney Spears is worried that her "comeback" tour will flop. She's finally got a good head on her shoulders, hasn't she? [ShowbizSpy]

• Alex Rodriguez must be into Madonna again, because he's resumed his hunt for an apartment two blocks away. [P6]
• How does a steakhouse beat the recession? Have artist Julian Schnabel decorate a closet and bill it as the most exclusive private dining space in the city. [P6]
• Woody Allen wasted no time signing Slumdog Millionaire's Freido Pinto to a role in his new movie. Maybe his former "muse" Scarlett Johansson can write a weepy song about it. Or, you know, just cover something by Tom Waits that reasonably approximates her feelings. [Mirror]
• Bernie Madoff's wife totally scammed a deli owner into selling her the Post at half price. [P6]
• Mario Batali denied calling a rowdy South Beach food festival crowd "weasel fuckwads," but more and more people keep confirming the story to the Post. [P6]
• Sharon Stone and Andre Balazs are apparently an item. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Hudson and Owen Wilson have been photographed sitting together on a park bench in Paris. Experts are still debating the deeper meaning and layered symbolism of this encounter.

And by blessings of course we mean his many Rolexes, whose diamond-bespeckled hands helped lift the actor in his hour of despair. At least that's what this post from Melrose Jewelers's weird, celebrity-focused blog seems to think—in a post so heartwarming, they've already issued a press release about it!

An excerpt:

After a frightening suicide attempt in 2007, Rolex watches and benefits appeared to play an essential role in actor Owen Wilson’s recovery...A People magazine cover story out Friday quotes a friend as saying: "Owen was very despondent. He slit his wrists. He almost did not make it." It was a dark period in Wilson life, and Rolex watches played a key role in helping Owen regain his bearings and his success.

Although Owen Wilson has worn a Rolex GMT Master in the popular films Wedding Crashers and The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, he chooses to wear a Rolex Submariner in his everyday life.

The Rolex Submariner is part of Rolex’s Oyster Perpetual Professional line. After returning home from the hospital, Owen was captured by a photographer walking on the beach, wearing his Rolex Submariner. Later, he was seen riding his mountain bike in Santa Monica with the Rolex Submariner on his wrist. Obviously, the quality of a Rolex watch helped Owen realize and appreciate the quality of his own life.

Obviously! From now on, every time Wilson looks at his wrists, he won't be thinking of the end. He'll be thinking of the beginning...of a love affair with the special edition Owen Wilson Rolex LifeAffirmer: a joyous, $24,000 platinum chronometer that can measure the humidity in four continents simultaneously. Hope winds eternal.

• Rolex Quality and the Recovery of Owen Wilson [Melrose Jewelers]

1. Jennifer Aniston is done with your questions about Brad Pitt. (For now.) Outperforming The Curious Case of Benjamin Button by more than $12 million — and setting a Christmas-release record in the process — confirms Aniston's box-office ownage over her ex-husband and should establish some self-sustained breathing room going forward. Until Pitt and Angelina Jolie both earn Oscar nominations next month, naturally, and the cycle begins anew. Enjoy it while you can, Jen.

2. Owen Wilson may never have to promote a film again. Already softball-averse in his first interviews since attempting suicide in 2007, Wilson can simply follow the Marley Model of letting his co-stars do the heavy-lifting / disrobing / cute-puppy thing while he retires to reclusive leading-mandom.

3. David Frankel is for real. The son of a former executive editor of the NYT, director Frankel has done nothing but make money for Fox since his feature debut The Devil Wears Prada. His formula: Adapt sources efficiently, cast intelligently, and let the principals do the rest — even the kids and dogs. It's a lot harder than it looks. Next up: The baseball procedural Moneyball, adapted from another best-seller and rumored to feature Pitt in the lead.

4. Fox is the hottest studio in town. After a year-long string of embarrassing flops and underachievers — including the recent, devastating one-two punch of Australia and Day the Earth Stood Still — the studio heads into 2009 with a likely repeater at #1 and a Watchmen judgment that could net it upwards of $50 million next spring. Without doing anything. If luck is the residue of design, then Fox's engineers are entitled to a raise.

5. The dog dies. Who knew? Oh.

• 'Marley' leads holiday box office pack [Variety]

Q: How challenging is it promoting this big fun family movie when the public seems to be so curious about your own lives?

Aniston: I think it's ridiculous. There's just this insatiable need. I also haven't had a movie in a long time, so hopefully this is going to create something else to talk about and realize that I have a job, and I'm an actress.

Wilson: This is the nice part. You get to talk about the work.

Aniston: I am honestly getting sick of it, and I feel like telling people, "You know what? It's none of your (expletive) business." Seriously, it's enough. It's like we're appealing to the lowest …

Wilson:… the worst in human nature.[...]

Q: Well, how does doing a film like this help?

Aniston: It's such a positive story. … I think sometimes people lose track and they forget, "God, this (stuff) is hard." And then you see a movie that reminds you … life isn't what you always imagine it to be. Life is what it is.

Wilson: That was nice. That was a great line.

Q: And what about your dogs? Do they help you get through the difficult times?

(Wilson, who was hospitalized in 2007 after what police called a suicide attempt, walks out.)

Aniston: You're talking about the stupid stuff? Yes.

(When Wilson returns, the question is repeated.)

Aniston: They do help.

Wilson: Yeah. That sounded nice.

• 'Marley' stars Wilson, Aniston feel an animal attraction [USA Today]

Among those observed in this installment: Owen Wilson, John Krasinski, Amy Adams, Ryan Phillippe, Neil Patrick Harris, Jared Leto, John Legend, Jonah Hill, Martin Landau, Chloe Sevigny, William Fichtner, Ron Livingston, Mekhi Phifer and more.

SATURDAY, SEPT. 20

Went to see The Women (the play, not the movie) in a theater near downtown, when I saw MARTIN LANDAU (looking dapper for 77) talking with JACK STEHLIN from Weeds. I was going to list some Martin Landau credits but imdb has 155 of them and I didn't know what to pick. Loved him in Ed Wood, though.

THURSDAY, SEPT. 25

Sept. 25 [At the] Aloud event at the LA Central Library, I spotted ERIC IDLE and a companion enjoying the battling accents of ARIANNA HUFFINGTON and BERNARD HENRI-LEVY. Looked like ALAIN GIRAUD may have been there as well, but I can't be sure. Idle and the Giraud lookalike repaired to Cafe Pinot for a post-talk meal, I expect to be joined by BHL and AH, since they were chatting on stage after the event.

FRIDAY, SEPT. 26

It was a transatlantic Dundler-Mifflin meetup on Friday (9/26) at the Magic Castle as JOHN KRASINSKI was hanging with STEPHEN MERCHANT (from The Office UK and Extras). The former looked way hotter and less goofy in person and the latter is a good seven feet tall and was chatting up AIMEE MANN.

I was dancing up a storm during the MSTRKRFT show at the Henry Fonda Theater when a guy walks right up and blocks my view. He turns around to face me and starts to mess around with his phone. I’m just about to call him out for being in my ‘personal space bubble’ (the dance floor was pretty empty by that time) when I realize that it’s JARED LETO! He looked a little rough: hair slicked back into a pony tail, scruffy facial hair, black army boots and red flannel shirt tight around his waste. '90s style flashback. I felt kind of sorry for him; Jared seemed a kind of bummed about not getting any celeb-like attention.

SATURDAY, SEPT. 27

A day earlier on Sept. 27, we saw RON LIVINGSTON and MEKHI PHIFER at the Shane Mosley-Ricardo Mayorga fight in Carson. They weren't together, dammit; Ron had his usual stubble and a third-row seat, while Mekhi was up on the concourse chatting with former fringe NBA player CHRIS MILLS before the main event.

SUNDAY, SEPT. 28

After watching my best friend perform an acoustic set at Level 5, someone commented "Hey, there's Jim from The Office." Sure enough, I turn around and there's JOHN KRASINSKI chatting it up with a very cute redhead and an equally cute blonde.

OWEN WILSON at The Other Room during the Abbot Kinney Festival. Fairly inconspicuous. He sat and texted the whole time, probably an hour two. I never saw him look up once. My trashed friend asked him what was going on with all the texting. Owen didn't understand the question. I think he left before the guy was killed outside. I saw that happen, pretty messed up.

Saw JONAH HILL at the Abbot Kinney Festival on Sunday the 28th. He was in the line for Sausage Masters but didn't seem to purchase anything. He must be on a diet as he's looking a little more svelte than usual. He was very sweet...

Saw BRENDAN SEXTON III at Sabor y Cultura cafe in Hollywood today. It was kind of dorky/endearing, there was a group of middle-aged gamers there and he went right over and was totally into it. He was with a tiny blond who was then forced to observe the gaming as well. I don't think anyone else knew who he was, I was just really into Welcome to the Dollhouse back in the day...

It feels like cheating to submit sightings from the A terminal at the Burbank airport, since celebs and plebes alike have to walk down that same narrow hall to exit the sad old barn, but what the hell. On Sunday night around 9 p.m., the following people walked by separately in a 4-minute span, presumably all coming off the late JetBlue flight from JFK: WILLIAM FICHTNER of Prison Break, wearing athletic-type clothes and walking so fast his hairline receded; NEIL PATRICK HARRIS, looking awesome in a black T-shirt and gaily chatting with some dude; CHLOE SEVIGNY, mousy-haired and depressingly dressed like a normal person; and finally AMY ADAMS, toting her own overstuffed Louis Vuitton bag and staring grimly ahead while marching with an entourage of at least two other chicks. No smile, no eye contact, still smoking hot.

Just got off AA115 from LHR to JFK. JOHN LEGEND was traveling in first class. A wee bit shorter then I anticipated.

Saw everyone’s favorite ex-lazy postman WAYNE KNIGHT at the Vendome Liquors in Toluca Lake on Sunday evening. Would have liked to say hi, but he was busy getting advice on red wine from one of the employees. Oh well.

MONDAY, SEPT. 29

RYAN PHILLIPPE with BFF and business partner BRECKIN MEYER at Nate 'n Al's in BH on Saturday morning.

1. Brad Pitt will win an Academy Award. We know the post-Toronto establishment has all but engraved Mickey Rourke's name on this year's Best Actor Oscar (hell, even Rourke has engraved his name on this year's Best Actor Oscar), but taking both The Wrestler (release date TBD) and Pitt's epic The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (12/25) sight unseen, we'll take the aging-backward-on-other-people's-bodies gimmick over the gritty indie comeback 10 times out of 10. Not that it won't be close: Brad Grey will spend more on his old pal's campaign than Fox Searchlight is probably ready to drop on Rourke's, but Rourke will be the more accessible nominee to the media. Look for dark horse Sean Penn (Milk) to split the field late; Focus Features won't settle for another 0-fer in '08.

2. W. (10/17) will tip the election to the GOP. Opening less than three weeks before Election Day, the film will be too muddled to move the Democrats yet irreverent enough to galvanize the Republican base against Hollywood one more time before voting. Oliver Stone will be recognized as the new Ralph Nader.

3. You're going to miss Don LaFontaine a lot more than you think. Otherwise execrable trailers like this one for The Haunting of Molly Hartley (10/31) acquired bittersweet relevance overnight:

4. The Weinstein Company will muscle its way back to prominence. Harvey had a relatively hemorrhage-free summer, closed out by his $16 million-grossing (and counting) Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Meanwhile, Zack and Miri Make a Porno (10/31) left Toronto with goodwill to spare, the LA immigrant saga Crossing Over (10/24) has Harrison Ford, Sean Penn and others channeling Crash, and the company bumped up The Reader for Kate Winslet Oscar consideration. (NB: The Rourke Factor also reportedly inspired Harvey to finally slot his long-shelved Killshot on Nov. 7.) The Weinsteins being the Weinsteins, of course, the operation could crash at any time, but at least the ensuing conflagration promises Hindenberg levels of spectacle. That's our Harvey.

5. Owen Wilson will emerge from, return to hiding after explaining the trailer to Marley & Me (12/25). That is all.

6. The Soloist (11/21) will be better than it sounds. But it sounds great, right? Robert Downey Jr. and Jamie Foxx, directed by Pride and Prejudice/Atonement helmer Joe Wright? Alas, the logline: "A schizophrenic, homeless musician from Skid Row, Los Angeles dreams of playing at Walt Disney Concert Hall." Based on a true story, natch: Downey Jr. plays the real-life LAT reporter who befriends him, warning Foxx behind the scenes about the perils of going full-schizo. All things being equal, we like their chances.

7. Charlie Kaufman's Synecdoche, New York (10/24) will be this year's unlikeliest tearjerker. Not just for its devastating, beautiful final act, but also for the probability that Sony Classics will weep red ink when it makes about five cents at the box office.

8. Twilight (11/21) will only be the second-best vampire movie released this fall. You won't find Let the Right One In (10/24) on the cover of EW, but you'll find the Swedish export in a lot of festival juries' hearts since last spring. Half coming-of-age romance and half vengeful horror epic, it picks up the story of a bullied 12-year-old boy whose sweet new girlfriend next door ends up being several thousand years older than she looks — and behaves accordingly. Genre distributor Magnet Releasing might only get this on a hundred screens, but watch the word-of-mouth and top-10-list acclaim bump it into sleeper status by the end of the year.

9. Extreme Movie will open to a $0 gross after viewers confuse it with the other, less-illustrious Movie franchise. But you can be prepared: Extreme Movie is the teen sex comedy starring Michael Cera and Frankie Muniz; Disaster Movie et. al. are the ones whose auditoriums smell faintly of piss. Know the difference!

10. Daniel Craig will miss 2006. Casino Royale was a surprising, sporadically brilliant reboot, but the honeymoon is over: Quantum of Solace's trailer isn't dazzling anyone; the title is stillborn; Sony couldn't settle on a US release date (it finally chose 11/14); and unfairly or not, franchise obsessives want nothing to do with new director Marc Forster. And all this after the Bond curse cost Craig part of his finger. It's a cruel world, but not as cruel as it'll seem after Defiance (12/12), the WWII Jewish resistance drama in which he and screen bros Liev Schrieber and Jamie Bell fight off Nazis during the invasion of Poland. Among the last of Paramount Vantage's orphaned prestige titles, and opening opposite Doubt, an expanded Frost/Nixon and The Day the Earth Stood Still, it's bound to knock Craig back to stardom's second tier for a while to come.

11. Beverly Hills Chihuahua (10/3) will astonish and amaze. But you already knew that.

1. Woody Was Owen's Personal Madam: Back in March 2007, when Owen and Kate were still in Phase One of their double act of a relationship, Wilson reportedly went on a Hawaiian vacation with his partner in paparazzi-bashing crime Harrelson, who owns a crash pad on the island. And the first sign of trouble in paradise came when Wilson was said to be hooking up with a Kate-lookalike coincidentally introduced to him in Hawaii by the Woodster.

2. Woody's Bare Butt Possibly More Scrumptious Than Kate's: And who can forget the, well, unforgettable sight of Harrelson's own set of natural born relationship-killers: the buns seen 'round the world while skinny-dipping with Wilson on a mid-Marley And Me, mid-Kate & Owen: The Sequel jaunt to Miami. Even Kate herself has pointed out her own lack of assets, and no matter how straight the Wilson is, who wouldn't be distracted from their current paramour's figure when face-to-ass with that behind?

3. Wildcats: Speaking of Woody's behind, both it and he made their film debut in the 1986 Goldie Hawn vehicle Wildcats, where Harrelson played Krushinski, the token dumb football player to Goldie's token ironic Chick Who "Gets" Sports role (see also: Bend It Like Beckham, A League Of Their Own or Blue Crush). As the NY Times noted in their review, this was "very much Miss Hawn's movie," the trailer speaks for itself when it comes to showing how Kate's mom dominated gum-chewing Woody's first chance to show his stuff, and despite its memorable spot in '80s cult classic sports movies, the film holds a 15% Fresh rating at Rotten Tomatoes. Whether or not Woody blames his dim debut on The Family is just a thought, but anyone as proud of their backside as he is might be miffed that its first shot at stardom was overshadowed by Goldie and her "sunny," "sexism-attuned" performance.

[Photo Credits: Celeb Pulp, Ecorazzi]

• WOODY HARRELSON IS DELIGHTED THAT OWEN WILSON AND KATE HUDSON ARE HISTORY [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]

boomp3.com

At LAX today, Anaconda star Owen Wilson wanted to show the fedora wearing community the proper way to use the latest fashion accessory: block your face from unnecessary exposure and photographs. Wilson felt that hat fanatic Samantha Ronson had been wearing her fedora improperly as of late. Wilson added, "Sometimes, you don't feel like having your picture taken and that's where the hat comes in. Throw it over your face and just carry on with your life." Wilson suggested that if Ronson was having issues with her hair then she should do what he does. Namely, either wear or carry an additional hat all the time. Wilson did say that the hat wasn't actually his; it belonged to his good pal, Woody Harrelson. Wilson said that the hat had a funny smell to it and wasn't sure if he would be able to get it through customs.

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

boomp3.com

A crestfallen David Spade left Hollywood hot spot Coco de Ville after being mistaken for daytime talk show host Ellen DeGeneres ... again. While waiting for a drink at the bar, Spade was tapped on a shoulder by a woman and was told that the woman just loves her talk show and think it's really great that she's going to marry Portia De Rossi ("You've got to lock that down"). When the Rules Of Engagement star turned around, the woman's face turned bright red and she quickly apologized. After the incident, Spade held a mini conference with his amigos about creating a new look; Spade said, "It was okay when I used to get mistaken for a Hanson Brother or Owen Wilson or a Boz Scaggs roadie, but this Ellen comparison is happening too often."

[Photo Credit: Splash Pics]

*A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

Instead of Corey Feldman, try Corey Haim: At the time of Drew’s fling with Feldman, picking between the two Coreys was a matter of Eeny Meeny Miney Mo, Catch A Cokehead By The Toe. Judging by their subsequent trajectories, Drew may have made the wiser choice. But it’s the other Corey, sent to the bottom of his pill bag by Defamer commenters, who currently needs all the help Drew’s strawberry-scented guffaws can bring.

Instead of Luke Wilson, try Owen Wilson: Maybe back in the late 90s Luke seemed like the more intriguing Wilson. His nose wasn’t quite as broken as his brother’s, Owen hadn’t bewitched us all with his Hans in Zoolander, and Luke had yet to permanently banish himself from crush lists by actually sharing screen time with Jessica Simpson. But if Drew goes back to the Wilson well, Owen is clearly the front-runner these days.

Instead of Tom Green, try Dane Cook: Because the barren landscape of horrendously unfunny comedians has a new mascot, and Drew’s fondness of sticking her tongue down her boyfriend’s throat might be the only way to shut this one up.

Instead of Justin Long, try PC Guy: Because John Hodgman is a treasure and deserves some action. Bonus points for Drew if she agrees to film a cameo in the next Apple commercial, makes Justin cry, short-circuit whatever totally awesome new Mac he’s holding, and permanently erase that smirk from his face.

[Photo credits: Wireimage, Getty]

• STAR EXCLUSIVE! DREW BARRYMORE AND JUSTIN LONG: IT'S OVER! [Star]

Yes, one ball wonder Lance Armstrong is discovering the benefits to following his pony around, namely in the form of residuals. While Hudson made some attempt to gussy up for the new-ish couple's lunch with Goldie, the bicyclist and sometimes-cameo artist threw on an old t-shirt and couldn't be bothered to shave his beard, leaving him looking like flip flop-less Matthew McConaughey's understudy in Fool's Gold. Which is a look that only works when you're elbow-deep in garbage and tears. And when you're Matthew McConaughey.

[Photo credit: Splash]

• KATE AND LANCE HAVE A BEACHSIDE LUNCH WITH GOLDIE HAWN [People]

The Fake-Outs: Mid-2007, before Britney was deemed an American Tragedy, she was on her way by tragically dating the poor man's David Blaine, Criss Angel. And photos of her blonde-weaved sunglasses-at-night self wearing a sparkler set the Britney-hungry gossips ablaze, only to disappoint us when no marriage plans surfaced. Another Bimbo Summit alum, Lindsay Lohan, was rumored to be on the soberific path towards married life with then-beau Harry Morton in 2006 after showing up to a premiere purposely placing a ring-adorned hand on her hip. But we all know how that union turned out. And the most recent and admittedly exciting engagement rumors were sparked after photographs of Kate Hudson wearing a real-life wedding band surfaced just as gossip started spreading that she and Owen Wilson were back on. But a major "D'oh!" was heard loud and clear after realizing Kate was filming this flick called Bride Wars and merely in character.

The Real Things: Beyonce Knowles started wearing massive diamonds on all her fingers ever since she could afford them, but the one she wore this January while sitting next to Jay-Z at a concert ended up being the engagement variety after all. And just days after being photographed candidly in her car with a new rock, Jessica Alba confirmed her engagement to the confusing man of mystery that is Cash Warren. As for Mariah Carey, poor girl sparked engagement rumors by publicly showing off her ring from Nick Cannon, only to learn soon after the actual wedding that it was recycled. Oops.

[Photo Credits: Fametastic, Showbiz Spy, Female First, Babble, Stupid Celebrities, Hollyscoop, Daily Mail]

• NOW CAMERON DIAZ FUELS ENGAGEMENT RUMORS AS SHE FLASHES HUGE SPARKLER ON HER WEDDING FINGER [Daily Mail]

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The Darjeeling Limited star Owen Wilson was out and about in New York City's West Village on a bicycle ride. When asked if Wilson's decision to go for a bike ride had anything to do with the recent news about Wilson's old flame Kate Hudson dating cyclist Lance Armstrong, Wilson shook his head "no," and added, "Nah, I just wanted to experience this glorious and wonderful New York afternoon and have a little fun while I'm at it." Wilson also said that he hadn't heard about Hudson being linked to Armstrong because he's too busy working on a film and spending plenty of time at headquarters (and by headquarters, he meant the New York City strip clubs).

[Photo Credit: INF Daily]

1. Group Dates Do Not A Romance Make: The "cozy dinner date" on Friday night that started all the rumors was actually a gathering of six people, not to mention four kids running around. Plus, the new couple didn't even sit next to each other.

2. Happy Livestrong Day! Lance is a proven expert when it comes to attaching his name to Hollywood names. He's already been linked to Sheryl Crow and Ashley Olsen, nabbed cameos on the big-screen (including You, Me And Dupree, the Wilson-Hudson rom-com), and gone on jogging dates with fellow shirtless enthusiast Matthew McConaughey. So it's hard to ignore the fact that he is once again making tabloid headlines during the same week as Livestrong Day, his annual bike ride held to raise awareness for cancer. Excellent cause, and an excellent way of calling attention to it?

3. Who Eats Tacos On A First Date? Hudson reportedly downed fish tacos on their "date," and Armstrong went for nachos. We're just sayin'.

• KATE'S REBOUND ROMANCE WITH LANCE [MSNBC]

Hudson’s recent Fool’s Gold flop hasn’t stopped her from signing up for yet more rom-coms revolving around silly girls and the silly boys they fall for. This September, we’ll see her in what sounds like You, Me And Dupree 2: This Time We’ve Got Dane Cook!, the “meet cute” vehicle My Best Friend’s Girl. And we’ve already seen shots of Kate filming what sounds like The Devil Wears Prada 2: Catfights Leap From The Office To The Altar!, the sure to be laugh-filled Bride Wars with Anne Hathaway and Candy Bergen. Though she has signed on for two dramas — Big Eyes, in which she’ll star as sad painter Margaret Keane, and A Dream Of Red Mansions — we just can’t get excited about “epic tales” set in mid-century China or Gwyneth-inspired attempts at Oscar fever playing a doomed artist.

As for Owen? No Oscars lie ahead, but cash definitely does. Marley & Me is based on the book with millions of fans, meaning a built-in audience awaits. And next year, the maligned money train that was Nightmare At The Museum will deliver its green-eyed sequel. Kate yearning for bucks and credibility, while Owen rolls in the dough with plenty of time to threesome-hop? Where is Dax Shephard when you really need him?

• KATE HUDSON & OWEN WILSON CALL IT QUITS [People]

At this point in Jessica Simpson’s sad, sad career, it’s become clear that her only chance of making headlines is by sleeping with a new guy, getting dumped by that new guy, or whining over one of the many guys who’ve dumped and/or slept with her. As we learned this week, her most recent conquest — QB Tony Romo, who Jessica called “her future husband” in Glamour’s March issue before admitting that “this article could come out and Tony and I could be broken up” — rid himself of the Game Day Curse just as her ex-fling John Mayer was popping up all over the weeklies swapping spit with Jennifer Aniston and her fembot nips. Naturally, Jessica reacted by drinking herself silly and, we presume, making several late-night calls to her Dadager, Papa Joe, requesting her next romantic PR stunt stat. So the question is: which lucky bachelors will Joe pay off set her up with this time to guarantee continuous coverage of his darling daughter? Our suggestions, after the jump.

Chase Crawford: Very worthy choice. Couple those gay rumors with his preference for blonde beards from the South, and it's a magic match in PR heaven.
Owen Wilson: Also a wise decision, though Joe would break the bank nabbing the Stallion. Also a blonde fan, Wilson is currently on the lookout for a Kate Hudson replacement and, if Jess is lucky, Wilson will relapse weeks into their depressing union, ensuring her distressed mug appears in the press for weeks.

Pete Wentz: Easy access, for sure. Both incestuous and sensational, Joe could always find a baby from whichever celebrity adoption agency delivered Suri Cruise to TomKat, and claim Pete is the father to not one, but both of his toothy princesses.
Sam Ronson: Sam is always available for the part of wingwoman, and the fits Lindsay would cause in the press would go on for months.

[Photo credits: Getty, Wireimage]

• JESSICA SIMPSON AND TONY ROMO THROW IN THE TOWEL [NYDN]

Regarding the Aniston/Mayer date in question, an OK! source described the pair as "very close and in deep conversation," while a pervier onlooker told Us, "they were very affectionate, definitely touchy, feely." Which is yucky, considering Mayer most recently touched and felt The Blogger Whose Name We Do Not Mention. But more importantly, Jen has been rumored to go on dates and flirt with co-stars Aaron Eckhart, Owen Wilson and, last we heard, Orlando Bloom. None of these rumors have ever gone the way of a Reese/Jake trajectory from "yeah, right" to one year relationship and still chugging along. How are we to interpret her behavior? Is she proving single women can date around and just have fun without worrying about that whole "settling down" thing? Or is this a PR-conceived strategy to make sure the public knows she's still a very wanted woman, and far from the teary mess Vanity Fair memorably cast her as just after her divorce? Lastly, should we just put a ban on any and all Jennifer Aniston Is Dating So-And-So stories in the future?

[Photo credits: Wireimage, FilmMagic, Daily Mail]

• JENNIFER ANISTON AND JOHN MAYER IN MIAMI [OK!]
• JENNIFER ANISTON, JOHN MAYER MEET IN MIAMI [Us]

• Tom Cruise will appear on Oprah Winfrey's show who for the first time since his couch-jumping insanity the last time he was on the daytime talk program. The twitchy Scientologist will be on the show twice, once May 2nd from home and then May 5th in Oprah's usual studio. The visit coincides with the 25th anniversary of his movie Risky Business. [AP]
• After going on Oprah, Cruise will smother Katie Holmes by following her to New York for six months. Or they were never going to get separated in the first place and the tabloids are looking for a storyline that prevents Cruise's presence from proving them wrong. Either way. [OK!]
• Birthday party for Cruise and Holmes' two-year-old: $100,000. Flowers alone cost $17,000. Plus the stress tests and thetan cleansing were probably also in the five-figure range. [LA Rag Mag]
• Donald Trump "was big on the idea" of having OJ Simpson on his Celebrity Apprentice show "for a few minutes" until NBC executives nixed the idea. That's kind of the opposite of what happened to Norm MacDonald, if I recall correctly. [P6]
• Police incorrectly answered a question from Uma Thurman's stalker about whether he was allowed to have a lawyer present, so now they have to throw out his confession. Wait, you can "confess" to stalking? Well, why not. [P6]
• The solution to Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson's many emotional problems? A child, of course. Owen's idea. [Star]
• Cynthia Nixon is getting married to her partner. [JJ's Dirt]
• Someone invited Jerry Springer to give the commencement address at Northwestern's law school, so of course the students are up in arms. But is the best response they can come up with really just to shout "You suck?" [P6]
• Laugh all you want at Amy Winehouse, she's worth $20 million, according to the Sunday Times. [Showbiz Spy]

boomp3.com

The photographer of this particular picture has assured his bosses and the editors of various weekly tabloid magazines that if they squint and stare real hard at the computer screen, they'll see it's a photo of Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson in a semi-romantic embrace. The photographer hopes to usher in a new era/style of paparazzi similar to the Magic Eye craze of mid 1990s. If one stares long enough, they'll be able to see some one famous.

[Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin]

"I need to find that 18-year-old in me again, who was way more adventurous when it came to kissing boys...I would love nothing more than to have a good, honest make out sesh."

After being asked if any English actors had caught her eye recently, Hudson responded by saying, "I was just having a discussion with somebody about that boy in Control [Sam Riley]. He's very cute." And it's true, he sort of is, but with his cropped hair and clean-cut face, Riley looks nothing like her hippie-ish ex-husband Chris Robinson or surfer boy Owen Wilson. But looks aside, Hudson assures us that "any guy I ever meet is always going to come second to my son...you get to weed out the boys from the men. You definitely know which ones are the boys." Which means Wilson, with his rehab stint and rumored on-set flirting with other baby-hungry actresses, has somehow made the cut. Apparently, boys can still be men even after participating in a one-on-one skinny dip session with apple-bottomed Woody Harrelson.

[Photo credit: Getty]

• KATE HUDSON IS ONE HOT MAMA [Sunday Times]

After seeing Woody very impressively hoist himself from the water to the cliff, we would like to get in touch with his trainer. Not as impressive are his tan lines, but with a behind like that, we'll forgive him.

As Woody happily trots back to the cabana with nary a care for who spots him, Owen takes a dive into the water wearing a much more standard pair of trunks. Which is sad, since we'd be more than happy to see Wilson follow in Woody's footsteps the next time around.

[Photo Credit: Kadena Pix via The Daily Mail]

• NATURAL BORN STRIPPER: WOODY HARRELSON SKINNY DIPS WITH HOLLYWOOD PAL OWEN WILSON [The Daily Mail]

1. Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who! - $25.1 million
A second solid week atop the box office officially cements this all-CGI adaptation of the beloved children's verse as a bona fide blockbuster. Proving a perfectly successful Seuss adaptation can come from not veering too far from the source material, directors are now lining up to pitch their own faithful versions of works from his canon. First up: Oliver Stone's searing take on The Butter Battle Book, tweaked to better evoke the Iraq War with suicide-Eight-Nozzled Elephant-Toted Boom Blitz-bombing Zook-insurgents.

2. Tyler Perry's Meet the Browns - $20.01 million
Oh, who really cares if it's anachronistically racist, sexist, and/or homophobic: Madea's back! And her legions of fans were eager to part with their disposable leisure-dollars just to catch the latest adventures of their favorite gat-toting drag-grandma.

3. Shutter - $10.7 million
Yet another horror thriller from the Far East about spooky digital photos that sneak up on you in the bathroom mirror de-Asianized for American consumption, the critically trounced U.S. version of the Thai original is notable only for starring Joshua Jackson, offering plenty of opportunities for smart-ass entertainment reporters to ask the, "Talk to Katie Holmes lately?" question at press junkets, just to see him get pissed off.

4. Drillbit Taylor - $10.2 million
Owen Wilson's return as a leading man was met with a lackluster response, as this Seth Rogen-co-written, Judd Apatow-produced comedy about—a kid bodyguard, or something?—lacked the menstrual blood heart of the creative team's last teen raunchcom foray.

5. 10,000 B.C. - $8.66 million
Run! CGI mammothsaurs! They'll kill us all!!!

• WEEKEND BOX OFFICE March 21-23, 2008 [Box Office Mojo]

Unlike Paramount's extensive marketing effort for Drillbit, Fox Searchlight depends on publicity to boost most of its theatrical release campaigns. With little free media (and good but not gushing reviews) for The Darjeeling Limited, the film came and went quickly, grossing just $11.9 million domestically and slightly more overseas.

Disney chose a different strategy with December 2006's Mel Gibson movie Apocalypto, whose release came on the heels of the actor-filmmaker's notorious anti-Semitic arrest rant. ... Although Gibson and CNN's Anderson Cooper famously didn't quite hit it off, the filmmaker was able to talk about his movie more than might have been expected.

The authors also note the strength of Hugh Grant's rebound from solicitation charges in 1995, and the subsequent $70 million take for his film Nine Months. It all makes sense on paper, which is the only kind of sense Fox will need this Christmas when it approaches the release of the currently in-production Wilson/Jennifer Aniston comedy Marley & Me. That's a duo with a ton of baggage, but that's part of what the studio paid for. (That doesn't even include the bump in the insurance budget — a number we'd be interested in knowing, and not a wholly separate issue from whether or not the studio can publicize its film in the end.) We don't think it's going too far out on a limb to presume Wilson will be on the promotional hook for the the holidays, is it?

• Owen Wilson sits out 'Drillbit Taylor' promotion [LAT]

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After a hard day of filming, The Butterscotch Stallion galloped at an alarming rate across the set, nearly leaving the entire cast and crew behind on the way to a very necessary and extremely vital party at Harry Dean Stanton's house.

[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

While it failed to evoke its majestic, sandy-maned namesake in anything but the most literal terms, the mention still gave us an ever-so-tiny taste of what it must feel like to make the leap from our blandly live-action coil into the glorious, bug-eyed bliss of the animated Springfield universe.

• The Simpsons

Seems that on a joint visit to their co-owned family shelter way down south, Owen and Woody launched a Die Hardesque assault against two Peruvian cameramen. And according to the report, Owen even masterminded a quasi-kidnapping. But even if both stories are bogus (Manny says his dog ate the photos), his rep did tell Page Six that he was, indeed, at the party in question on Friday, which was sponsored by a liquor company. Heading south of the border with Woody and causing a fuss at Patron-funded events? Seems even a repeat performance as the Butterscotch Stallion might be a better way to show up on the gossip pages.

• OWEN NUTS OVER FOTOG [NY Post]
• WOODY HARRELSON AND OWEN WILSON ATTACK REPORTERS IN CUSCO, PERU [Living In Peru]

• Marc Jacobs' threesome-friendly boyfriend Jason Preston is chivalrous and brave, if not literally ass-kicking. He saw a guy throw a drink on a girl, in a club, and told the dude to apologize. Unfortunately, the guy then whaled on Preston. Still, Bryanboy will be so totally proud. [P6]
• Owen Wilson maybe hooking up with Jennifer Aniston shows how two people can somehow look crazy, desperate and hot at the same time. [Star]
• Wilson jumped across a pool in front of 150 people in Miami, and went crazy when a hired photographer took a picture. He made the photographer delete the picture, because he's too insane to realize that 10 other guests probably already have the video on their cell phones. [P6]
• Britney Spears' dad has been sifting through the singer's financial wreckage, along with his lawyer, and it looks like former Britney hanger-on Sam Lutfi is going to take the fall for some of her problems. A source told the Post: "Her business affairs were in disarray because Sam [Lutfi] had isolated Britney, and it's going to be a very tedious task of going through everything." [P6]
• Reporters, photographers so busy stalking disgraced Gov. Eliot Spitzer they miss movie superstar Tom Hanks walking right by. [P6]
• Actress Keira Knightley sings three tracks on her new soundtrack and is all, "a sound emerged that wasn't too disagreeable." You're supposed to be all, "you were GREAT!" [Perez]
• Janet Jackson is too sick to show up for Saturday Night Live, even though it could save her weak album sales.
• Entertainment TV host Pat O'Brien is out of rehab, positively gorging on junk food and his network just isn't talking about him so don't ask. [TMZ]
• Rapey Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis is now free to go wild outside of jail. [P6]
• Sean Penn was seen at the Oscars looking thrilled with his blonde supermodel date, but now he's been spotted with a "mid-twenties brunette... wearing tight jeans with tall boots" at the St. Francis hotel in San Francisco. Also, "his car looked like the 'Bat Mobile.'" [OK!]
• How sensitive is singer John Mayer? He keeps Xanax on his person at all times. [P6]

First of all, the numbers for 2007 don't include special People issues like "Sexiest Man Alive."

Also, at the other celebrity magazines, lighter covers topped the sales rankings:

OK!... found a pending birth story on the pregnancy of teen tart Jamie Lynn Spears to be its top seller. The magazine hit newsstands at New Year's Eve and claimed sales of well more than 1 million copies...

Us Weekly's best issue was a surprise: Jessica Simpson's losing of 20 pounds in two months....

Star's best seller was the 36 best and worst beach bodies, while its worst was "Angelina Jolie Babies in Danger."

NY Post: DEATH REARS ITS PROFITABLE HEAD FOR CELEB MAGS

In today's episode: Bruce Willis; Kiefer Sutherland; Kris Kristofferson; Elizabeth Berkly; Owen Wilson; Matt Dillon; Naveen Andrews; Judd Apatow and Leslie Mann; Rashida Jones; Amanda Peet and David Benioff; Keri Russell; BJ Novak; Nicole Richie and Joel Madden; Brian Grazer; Brad Grey; Ian Ziering; Valerie Bertinelli; Grant Show; Udo Keir; Travis Barker; Jason Bantha; Jorja Fox; Eric Wareheim; Sara Rue and Glenn Morshower; and Joey Buttafuoco.

· Bruce Willis shopping at John Varvartos on Melrose wearing a lavender sweater on Saturday March 1st.

· Last Friday - Kris Kristofferson in the New Zealand Air/Virgin lounge form LAX to London. No matter how old that guy is he always looks the same. I looked up at him as he came out of the bathroom and he smiled and did a little hat tilt at me...I felt a bit awkward and in no way attracted to him.

· Yesterday - Virgin Atlantic lounge at Heathrow and upper class on Virgin was our favorite world savior - Kiefer Sutherland. Actually looked quite good, thin and euro in jacket, tie, scarf and sunglasses. Probably the first time I've considered him sexy. He sat where everyone could see him but no one would talk to him in the lounge. Sadly, he slept most of the flight and didn't attack anyone.

· And finally, the best sighting ever - Nomi Malone, aka Jessi Spano, aka Elizabeth Berkly at Bodyfactory near the Arclight. I was behind her in line and hear a voice that was strangely familiar and loud asking if there was any lactose in the shake because she is lactose intolerant. I almost peed my gym shorts with excitement when I noticed it was Nomi. Showgirls is probably the greatest film of all time (and my favorite)...sadly, she caught me texting my friends and looking at her like 10 times. I genuinely wanted to ask for a picture but thought she'd get all Nomi on me. She's really tall and quite gorgeous.

· Feb 29 - Owen Wilson was spotted looking at art today with his dog, Garcia, at Regen Projects, where he looked at Raymond Pettibon's older drawings and Catherine Opie photographs of surfers.

· March 6 - Matt Dillon getting his mack on at the celebrity coffee bean(sunset and fairfax). He got dropped off in a crystler and proceeded to get his drink, then quickly began hitting on young girls. Reminded me of his brother johnny drama

· i saw Naveen Andrews on the corner of 4th and Santa Monica Blvd (near 3rd st promenade) on Feb. 29 around 7pm. Naveen was with a hot model-type chick (not Barbara Hershey—did they break up?). Naveen didn't look too happy to be reconized. i stared at him shamelessly, because i am an obsessive fan of LOST!!! i wanted to yell "Help me get back to the island, Sayid!!!!!" but i was too afraid he would torture me. Naveen and the mystery chick then headed into some fancy restaurant for dinner........

· March 3, 2008 Saw Naveen Andrews (LOST) at a park in Santa Monica. Was pushing my stroller and being sleep-addled and before I could stop myself, I turned to my husband and blurted out: "OH MY GOD, IS THAT SAYID?" To which Naveen laughed and waved. Then because I'm a total dork, I felt compelled to give him a thumbs up, to which he laughed and waved some more and then drove off in his sweet ass ride — a Porsche. btw, he's a total hottie.

· The next weekend I saw the always amazing Judd Apatow and his funny-talented wife, Leslie Mann, at the Grove. You'd never pick them out of a crowd, he in jeans and baseball cap, she in puffy jacket and sweat pants. Like not the velour matching kind but the old school kind of sweats — green with elastic around the ankles. It was raining. They seemed comfy and thank god because us understated puffy jacket and scarf wearing regular jeans people need to stick together... I mean, I've seen enough Marc Ecko jeans in LA to last a lifetime.

· Last night (3/6) I went grocery shopping and saw: 1) at the WeHo Trader Joe's Rashida Jones with chic geek glasses on—quite polite and very beautiful w/no make-up then 2) at the BH Bristol Farms Amanda Peet & David Benioff & their beautiful chubby baby. Amanda looked a little sleep-deprived but then again she didn't have make-up on either and still looked better than me. That's all.

· Saw Felicity (Keri Russell) at the bucolic Palisades Farmers' Market two weeks ago. She had her cute baby boy in one of those slings (Bjorns?) and looked fresh faced and happy, chatting with her similarly beponytailed husband. But she was super skinny. I know she's probably naturally tiny, but I'm not sure how her frail frame even supported the weight of that kid. Keri! The Oscars are over and you looked lovely! Now reward yourself with a sandwich for god's sake. The kid is going to be scarred for life if mommy
snaps in half next time she tries to pick him up.

· On March 1st I was waiting in line at the Starbucks at the Farmers Market at 3rd and Fairfax BJ Novak of the office got in line behind me. He had sunglasses and looked like he hadnt shaved for a week also he looked kind of edgy like he wanted to get out of there as quick as possible.

· Geeze, i think it was Monday march 3. Nicole richie and joel madden shopping for lingerie at neman marcus in beverly hills. Im guessing they were shopping for her... Her boobs looked like they did when she was fat. Milk does a body good indeed.

· wednesday - 05 march. malibu colony plaza. decided to have sushi for lunch when who should i see walking out of the restaurant but BRIAN GRAZER with, no - not his new cultural attache/shamen - rather his new girlfriend, pianist chau-giang nguyen. he's way shorter than i imagined, though his melon is as enormous as it looks in photos. his skin gives keith richards a run for its louis vuitton epi leather texture. chau was wearing a sun hat the size of an o.g. satellite dish. i'm guessing she thinks of brian as a cautionary epidermal tale. good call.

· Spotted at the Grove on Sunday 3/2: Paramount overlord Brad Grey shopping with daughter in Apple Store (didnt buy anything) and the adjacent Nike store. BG checked out the Nike merchandise and then spent some time in the changing area trying on different pairs of athletic pants while checking out HIS merchandise in the mirrors i.e. "does my but look fat in these trackpants?"

· Sat, March 1 - So, I've just gotten my bikini line waxed at FACE IT SKIN AND NAIL SPA in Hollywood at La Brea and Sunset in the El Pollo Loco/ Wendy's strip mall. As I walk back out to the nail area in my state of post-pain euphoria, I see a familiar man with a distinctive blonde fro-mullet. It's Steve Sanders! Excuse me, it's IAN ZIERING. He's sitting in one of the spa chairs getting a pedicure and the best thing about it is that he has that same perfect, smirky smile you always see on his face. Today it said, "That's right, Baby. You remember me, I'm Steve Sanders and I'm gettin' a pedicure." What is it with that smirk, EYE-An? What the f#@$ secrets of life do you know that I don't know? I know he lives in this annoying hood and all I can think is, if I were him and had a couple of bucks, I'd move as far east of Vermont as would make me cool again.

· I saw Valerie Bertinelli shopping with her man Tom Vitale in the Studio City Ralph's on Saturday night (03/01). She looked great in jeans and sunglasses, what a cutie. Then I went home and she was on a late night Oprah rerun promoting her new book "Losing It".

· Former Melrose Placer - Grant Show (you'll always be JAKE to me!) at Happy Ending's bar on Sunset. Man, he is aging well! Homie looks good for 46-years old, floppy hair and rock hard abs. I tried to get him to win me a lobster out of the tank, but he was too busy staring at some blond (sad face).

· A friend and I were enjoying $5 pitchers of beer at the Eagle in Silverlake on Monday night, March 3. I then notice Udo Keir cruising the bar in a black leather biker jacket and pristine blue jeans, how utterly German of him or not, it's a leather bar. He looked creepy and surprisingly well preserved. He left without closing a deal.

· March 3 - So I'm leaving the Disneyland Grand Californian after having brunch with my friends and I see a filthy looking, tatooed amaciated Travis Barker "rolling" in to the valet. From out of the ghetto fabulous Escalade emerges Shauna Moakler sans extensions and makeup and a bunch of little children. They were very conspicuous with the ink and Travis with his big shades in ANAHEIM!

· Tues, March 4, The Room (Cahuenga Corridor)
enjoying a late night snatchtail with some friends where we spotted Jason Bantha of National Treasure and Peadbody award winner National Treasure 2 having some drinks at dancing in that goofy white hipster boy kind of way. looked super cute and seems like an okay guy.

· Last Saturday (Mar 2) saw Jorja Fox with 3 non-celeb friends (2 guys and a girl) buying wine a bit after 10pm at CapNCork on Hillhurst in Los Feliz. She was in jeans, green shirt and white vest, hair down, no makeup and looking very casual but easily recognizable.

· i saw a very tall Eric Wareheim (from tim and eric awesome show on adult swim) last night at Katsuya in Studio CIty. He was with a gorgeous girl with short blonde hair, i assume it was his girlfriend. They were smiling and laughing, and very affectionate. It was very cute to watch and he seemed really sweet.

· At the Commerce Casino on March 3rd, watching the final table at the World Poker Tour event, saw the perfectly lovely Sara Rue (Less Than Perfect) seated front row to cheer on a friend. Also spotted veteran character actor Glenn Morshower in the crowd. OK, honestly I spotted "Agent Aaron Pierce" in the crowd, and had to check IMDB for his real name. Regardless, having a few seasons of 24 on his resume makes him the closest I've gotten to a Kiefer sighting in a while.

· March 5, 2008 12:50:31 PM PST - Joey Buttafuoco dining outside at the ivy right now!!

• Kate Hudson is, once again, riding the Butterscotch Stallion. She and fellow actor Owen Wilson had a weird double-date in Miami with Jennifer Aniston and Eric Dane the night after Hudson spent time with Wilson at a 10-bedroom mansion, having been spotted on the way in by crafty paparazzi. Their friends are totally against it.
• Actress Bai Ling said her arrest for shoplifting $16 in batteries and celebrity magazines was a big misunderstanding. Which actually makes sense, given the state of martial law under which most airports seem to operate, and given that no celebrity magazine (Star included) is remotely worth trying to shoplift. [P6]
• To make "those panties slide right off," rapper-turned-chef Coolio recommends "Sautéed Shrimp and Soul Rolls, baby." [Serious Eats]
• Late night host David Letterman jogs with two iPods and headphones with a proper headband, none of this "earbud" business. [P6]
• Professional rich girl Nicole Richie hates looking "slutty," so she wants her mama boobs to go away. [Showbiz Spy]
• Bizarre: Parker Posey and Keanu Reeves said to be an item. Maybe he was just sitting so close to her because he's weird and dense? Though she is weird and smart and you know what they say about opposite weirds: whichever one is freakiest kills and devours the other. [OK!]
• Rosie O'Donnell is launching a redesign of her website April 1. y do you have 2 change? [Ask Ro]
• Singer Britney Spears cannot stop dancing. Excellent activity, among the range of possible choices, to do compulsively. Bravo! [Faded Youth]
• Salma Hayek, the actress, really wanted a boy but is making do with her daughter. [P6]
• Chinese restaurant Philippe has potentially awesome hidden-camera videos of celebrity guests. [P6]

The 28-year-old blonde actress was spotted visiting the 39-year-old actor at his Malibu, California home on Monday, following his appearance at the Oscars the night before. And on Saturday morning, Wilson was photographed leaving Hudson's Pacific Palisades home, before reuniting with the actress later that day at 5pm at his own home."

Finally, some good news on the trouble-laden star front! After a year filled with overdoses, manic meltdowns and senseless gun battles with Eddie Munster, we're glad to see that notorious slacker Owen Wilson is setting a positive example for how the drug-and-drink obsessed Young Hollywood set can comeback from Difficult Setbacks™. Are you listening, Dr. Drew? Scrap Daniel Baldwin from Season Two of Celebrity Rehab and see if you can't convince Owen Wilson to come on board as the group's mentor; we're sure that Verne Troyer would appreciate the opportunity to network with the shaggiest of the Wilson siblings.

• BACK ON? KATE HUDSON 'REKINDLES HER ROMANCE' WITH TROUBLED EX OWEN WILSON [Daily Mail]

That's right, with flagrant disregard for W.C. Fields' timeless advice never to act with children or animals, Owen will be playing the lead in the film adaptation of John Grogan's best seller Marley & Me—a story about a Wilsonesque dude who adopts the world's worst Labrador retriever. So what does Grogan think about this inspired bit of casting? So sayeth the author, "I'm actually really thrilled to have Owen Wilson portray me. We don't look anything alike but I think his personality will be a great fit to my own."

You know, who are we to be all snarky about this? If we went through whatever it is Owen went through, we probably wouldn't much feel like challenging ourselves either. Besides, the eternally single Jennifer Aniston's also in it, and she's still kinda hot, right? See you in the theater!

• Owen Wilson Ready to Head Back to Work [People.com]

Playing the tried-and-true role of bleeding-heart teacher (perfected already by Michelle Pfeiffer first in Dangerous Minds and Ryan Gosling in Half Nelson), Coogan's annoyingly named character Mr. Marschz will save his drama department by writing a sequel to Hamlet. Judging by the dearth of updated Shakesperean knee-slappers in the last decade of cinema (does 10 Things I Hate About You count?), we're not really sure how Coogan pulls this off, but we are hoping for a Courtney cameo in which she slithers onto the stage of the inevitable High School Musical-like finale and whispers "Oh what a rogue and peasant slave am I!" in her crackheadiest voice.