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Scoring Sunday's Nuptials: Of Muppets, Monkeys, and Mexican Wrestling

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Scientology Revelations: 'Presentation Drills,' Beatdown Offerings, and Tom Cruise's Audit Sessions

Scientology Revelations: 'Presentation Drills,' Beatdown Offerings, and Tom Cruise's Audit Sessions #awesomethings #scientology

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House Democratic Health Care Package: Passed #breaking #healthcare

Health Care Vote Draws Near, DC's Crazies Out in Full Force: Babies, Fatties, Death Threats, Paper

Health Care Vote Draws Near, DC's Crazies Out in Full Force: Babies, Fatties, Death Threats, Paper #wtf #healthcare

Who Took Down the Ft. Hood Shooter?

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Eleven Things You Could Do Instead of Reading Jonathan Safran Foer's Book about Not Eating Meat

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Canadian Editors: Freaking the F—k Out, Just Like Their American Counterparts #blamecanada #torontostar

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    Send a link to this post 'Heaven's Movie Pirates About To Meet Their Worst Nightmare' via email:


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    Apr 26, 2007 9:59 PM 2,246
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    There's The Right Way, The Wrong Way And The Scarlett J Way

    Hollywood Privacywatch: Adrian Grenier Not Afraid Of A Little PDA

    Defamer Welcomes Stu VanAirsdale As The Newest Member Of Our Editorial Team

    read more: #obits, #defamer, #jackvalenti, #pirates, #defamer

    Heaven's Movie Pirates About To Meet Their Worst Nightmare


    It is with a heavy heart that we note the passing of former MPAA lobbyist Jack Valenti, an enemy of the movie-pirate menace so terrifying that a future generation of unauthorized downloaders will trade apocryphal stories about the copyright-defending bogeyman in hushed tones while watching illegal copies of Spider-Man 16, visibly trembling as they hear once again how a DVD-ripping friend of a friend's grandfather once awoke to find Valenti's hook embedded in the side of her computer and the message STOP RAPING HOLLYWOOD scrawled in blood on the bedroom wall. The LAT has a detailed obituary for those interested in the hyperbole-prone pirate-hunter and ratings system pioneer's legacy; after the jump, a tribute round-up of our long-ago posts about Valenti's fascinating thoughts on subjects like elves, the hostess-humping absurdity of the Hays Code era, and the un-fucking-believable magic boxes that assist outlaws in stealing food from the mouths of honest stuntmen:

    · Jack Valenti, Champion Of The Ratings System

    · Jack Valenti Shares His Thoughts On Politics, Elves

    · MPAA Chief Jack Valenti: Really, We Love This Inter-Thing

    · Nerd Stumps Jack Valenti

    · Jack Valenti: Cigarettes Are Stealing Our Movies!

    · Jack Valenti Won't Go Quietly

    [Photo: Getty Images]

    • Jack Valenti, 85; former Hollywood lobbyist pioneered film ratings system [LAT]


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