With the Golden Globes ceremony boring the world into a state of vegetation, viewers are placed in the unprecedented position of turning to the Oscars for entertainment. First-time host Chris Rock gives the NY Times his best "What pressure?" schtick, tossing off a reference to Janet Jackson's "titty" (we think that's the word he used), promising to swipe an award for Jamie Foxx if he doesn't win, and shrugging off The Aviator's buzz:

It's a weird movie; it's well made, but a story about a rich guy who gets things done doesn't excite me. Oooh, he overcame obstacles, like how much money to spend. And he washed his hands a lot.

If he really wants to get edgy, he'll grab Martin Scorcese by the eyebrows, yank the director's head into his crotch, and tell him that's the only bald-headed guy he'll be seeing that night. But after sitting through three hours of the Globes, Rock can probably slide by on a couple of Hilary Swank lesbian jokes and a riff about how white people really love their merlot.

• This Oscar Host Is Willing to Call It as He Sees It [NYT, reg. req'd.]


• BREAKING! Press Release Reveals Chris Rock To Host Oscars [Defamer]

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