Last week, the world (yes, the entire world, from Sally Struther's starving African children to the troops in Iraq, a veritable rainbow of hopelessly smitten humanity) was relieved when a story about an impending divorce between Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey was quickly retracted. So we're confident that this radio interview, in which an ex-girlfriend of Bam "Jackass/Viva La Bam" Margera reveals that he and Johnny Knoxville both "F'd" Simpson, will bounce harmlessly off the happy, Teflon couple. Perez Hilton helpfully transcribes the interview:

Jen [Bam’s ex]: He cheated on me with 45-50 girls. Yes, he did F- Jessica Simpson.
DJ: And you know this for a fact?
Jen: I know this for a fact. He woke up in her bed. I have an email. He told me all about it.
DJ: How long have you guys been broken up?
Jen: Two and a half months. The whole thing is a lie. The whole show [Newlyweds] is a lie.
DJ: When did the whole Jessica Simpson thing go down?
Jen: It was in LA. He [Bam] was at a Hem [some band] show with Ryan [a fellow Jackass] and Jessica was there and she started grinding up on him and he was like, “What the hell? It’s Jessica Simpson.” I hope it burns when he pees! [...]
DJ: This is going to get out and be a big bombshell for Jessica Simpson and her people
Jen: She humped PJ too while they were shooting Dukes of Hazzard. DJ: Who?
Jen: PJ. [Ohh] Johnny Knoxville [PJ is his real name]. She [Jessica] is as dumb as she looks.

To mangle some Simpsonian poetry, it'll be like water off a Chicken of the Sea's back!

• Another Cho in the Morning Worldwide Exclusive [Q102.com]


• Jessica Simpson Fucked My Boyfriend! [PerezHilton]

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