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    Monday Morning Box Office: Audiences Gobble Charlie's Box Office Chocolatey Goodness

    charlie-chocfactory.jpgLike manna from heaven, your weekend box office numbers:

    1. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory—$55.4 million
    Charlie got our money this weekend; when we go through the effort of breaking out the bolt cutters and liberating ourselves from the chains that keep us bound to this computer 18-20 hours a day, it usually signals* a healthy opening for the recipient of our ticket-buying largesse (notable exceptions: Sky Captain, Bikini Boppin' Balloon Poppers 14-21). The Danny Elfman music numbers, performed by a chorus of Oopmpa Loompas each time one of the factory-touring brats are "offed," are worth the overpriced ArcLight ticket all by themselves.

    [*We also believe that the we own a "lucky shirt" that influences the outcome of sporting events.]

    2. Wedding Crashers—$32.2 million
    All hail the Butterscotch Stallion and the Oversized Jockey, who've taken an R-rated comedy above $30 million, temporarily making the world safe for gratuitous topless shots and "adult language and situations." Enjoy it while it lasts, because WC's results should inspire a flurry of R-rated comedy projects hastily put into development by studios desperate to get a piece of the action, bought off one-line pitches like "Ben Stiller and Will Ferrell are recovering sex addicts who unexpectedly find themselves judging the Hawaiian Tropic bikini contest." Hey, that one's ours. We'd better not see that in Variety on Wednesday.

    3. Fantastic Four—$22.7 million
    Looks likes audiences have spit the FF's bit, dropping off 59.5%. A shame, really. But you should be able to pick up those Human Torch ATVs in your local Wal-Mart's clearance bin this week.

    4.War of the Worlds—$15 million
    If you really hunt through the aforementioned Wal-Mart sale bin, you should also be able to pick up a bottle of Tom Cruise's Excitable Children's Chewable Vitamins on the cheap.

    5. Batman Begins—$5.6 million
    Goodbye, Batman. We'll see you in the Netflix queue.



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