Now I’m not suggesting Brad Pitt likes to make a little shoe polish mustache and goose step around the house—how could I?—we’ve never met and I don’t mind admitting to you that I have no idea what acclaimed actor Brad Pitt does in his spare time—but let’s say if he did, this three-wheeled Nazi bike would be a great accoutrement.
Brad Pitt, dressed up as a Nazi, will no longer have to make vroom vroom noises with his mouth—if in fact he’s ever done that—though who’s to say he hasn’t, honestly? Angelina Jolie, I guess, and she’s not saying anything.
In the meantime, we’ve put out a request to Pitt’s publicist to determine whether he ever has, in fact, inquired of his many children, Do you have your papers? in a reedy German accent before allowing them to enter the formal dining room—and we will update as we hear back.