![<em>Variety</em> Thinks 'No One Takes [Its] Reviews Seriously,' Which Is Probably Why It Fired Its Critics](http://cache-02.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/7/2010/03/126x100_iron_cross_03.jpg "<em>Variety</em> Thinks 'No One Takes [Its] Reviews Seriously,' Which Is Probably Why It Fired Its Critics")
Jan 23, 2009 01:27 PM
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Hollywood, 9:40 PM
Thu Mar 11
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Here's a few reasons you might want to think twice about posing for the cover of Page Six Magazine:
Reason #1: It's called Page Six Magazine.
Reason #2: Three months later, they'll repurpose the material in a new, four-page story entitled, "Is Jeremy Piven the biggest jerk in showbiz?”
From the article:
Page Six Magazine writer Annie Karni reports that Jeremy Piven doesn’t always take kindly to direction. At a September Page Six Magazine photo shoot to promote his starring role in the Broadway revival of Speed-the-Plow, the actor was in a foul mood. “This isn’t my first time on the merry-go-round,” he shot at a staffer who asked that he pose for a traditional headshot and make eye contact with the camera. “You want mediocre? I can give you mediocre.” He mocked the crew by grinning like he was posing for a DMV shot.
An hour later, Jeremy didn’t want to give mediocre anymore. He popped his collar. He ducked under the photographer so that the camera would catch him at a height-enhancing angle. Letting out a gutteral moan, he ripped the sleeves off a $350 Giorgio Armani shirt.”
Of course, that "gutteral moan" was actually just the sound of the previous night's dinner of a dozen squishy slices of sea urchin reverberating in Piven's large intestine; their high dioxins, pesticides and PCBs levels have been linked to a temporary dementia that turns you into a garment-rending, insufferable pain-in-the-ass. We can only hope the removal of sushi from Piven's diet will reverse the debilitating effects.
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