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    Photoshoot Thrown Into Chaos After Jeremy Piven Complains of Acute Shirtsleeve Poisoning

    Here's a few reasons you might want to think twice about posing for the cover of Page Six Magazine:

    Reason #1: It's called Page Six Magazine.
    Reason #2: Three months later, they'll repurpose the material in a new, four-page story entitled, "Is Jeremy Piven the biggest jerk in showbiz?”

    From the article:

    Page Six Magazine writer Annie Karni reports that Jeremy Piven doesn’t always take kindly to direction. At a September Page Six Magazine photo shoot to promote his starring role in the Broadway revival of Speed-the-Plow, the actor was in a foul mood. “This isn’t my first time on the merry-go-round,” he shot at a staffer who asked that he pose for a traditional headshot and make eye contact with the camera. “You want mediocre? I can give you mediocre.” He mocked the crew by grinning like he was posing for a DMV shot.

    An hour later, Jeremy didn’t want to give mediocre anymore. He popped his collar. He ducked under the photographer so that the camera would catch him at a height-enhancing angle. Letting out a gutteral moan, he ripped the sleeves off a $350 Giorgio Armani shirt.”

    Of course, that "gutteral moan" was actually just the sound of the previous night's dinner of a dozen squishy slices of sea urchin reverberating in Piven's large intestine; their high dioxins, pesticides and PCBs levels have been linked to a temporary dementia that turns you into a garment-rending, insufferable pain-in-the-ass. We can only hope the removal of sushi from Piven's diet will reverse the debilitating effects.


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