Jan 6, 2009 02:40 PM
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Hollywood, 3:09 PM
Tue Feb 9
56 posts in the last 24 hours
That "sold" sign on the Web space across the street from Defamer HQ finally came down today, with new, conservative neighbors Big Hollywood moving in at last. Let's go meet them, shall we?
Publisher Andrew Breitbart had promised BH for a while, with a few early posts teasing us since Sunday. But now, with editor John Nolte's official welcome and a (literal) raft of vaguely movie-centric contributions from his like-minded associates, we have a better idea of what to expect. In short, this is your grandfather's Defamer.
We've scoured pretty much the whole site to date and recommend a sort of five-course, welcome-to-the-neighborhood meal for your own first visit:
· Hors D'oeuvre: "Hollywood Loves Higher Taxes," by Melanie Graham
Tasting Notes: Flaky, with sharp, bitter aftertaste. Goes down easy in 59 words, but eat too many (e.g. "It’s the hypocritical secret here - the lefty actors and writers all incorporate themselves to avoid higher taxes but expect everyone in Rube State America to pony up"), and you'll be full before you know it.
· Appetizer: "Big Hollywood Loves the Arts," by John Nolte
Tasting Notes: Tender, if slightly greasy: "[W]e believe the arts must improve, but know that’s an impossibility until the discussion includes the ideas and ideals of everyone."
· Salad: "Does Hollywood Love Christians Now?" by Dallas Jenkins
Tasting Notes: Salty, not too heavy, with unusual and intrepid flavor pairings: "When Sony released Brokeback Mountain, they didn’t shy away from a few explicit gay sex scenes, as that would have been compromising; one wonders if they would extend the same treatment to explicit prayer or churchy scenes in a faith-based film that had a budget above $5 million."
· Entree: "'C-List' Casting Call: Will Hollywood Conservatives Come Out to Play?" by Rep. Thaddeus G. McCotter (R-MI)
Tasting Notes: Robust and buttery. A bit overcooked but likely satisfying to discriminating palates:
Republican oriented artists, however, have been involuntarily subjected to Big Hollywood’s new version of the old “blacklist’: the “C-List” of conservatives who are marked for censorship and career ruin for deviating from Left-wing orthodoxy. Nonetheless, though our specific struggles differ, we are equally embattled and immutably bonded, because we suffer for our love of America.
· Dessert: "Where Are All the Cinema Heroes Today?" by Orson Bean
Tasting Notes: Sweet, soft, falls apart when you cut into it: "[T]he movies represented a lot more than escape to me. They represented moral guidance. What I learned at home was despair and hopelessness. What I learned at the pictures was don’t give up the ship, we have only begun to fight, it’s always darkest before the dawn."
Bon appetit!
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