· RIP Paul Newman, dead at 83. Remember him fondly here.
· One press release, a "leaked" e-mail and an ill-conceived $1 million bet later, Harvey Weinstein and Scott Rudin settled their Reader kerfuffle.
· Rest assured that when Heather Locklear finally tells her story about that crazy night in lock-up, it won't be to US Weekly.
· This week in speedy recoveries: Travis Barker went home, DJ AM went out.
· Anne Hathaway may not be game for anal sex, but she's up for David Letterman's BDSM any night of the week.
· Wrestler Oscar-hopeful Mickey Rourke had a resolutely healthy perspective on his comeback: "You change, or you blow your fucking brains out." Amazing! That's just what our therapist told us!
· We heard the four most dreaded words since "Verne Troyer sex tape": "Britney Spears sex tape." Meet the director if you must.
· Ricky Gervais may or may not be a "fat idiot," but in any case remember: It's glandular, you cunt.
· Fireworks on The View were brought to you this week by Bill Maher, Barbara Walters and, naturally, Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Twice.
· You are cordially invited to the grand opening of Tyler Perry Studios this weekend in Atlanta — black tie and picket sign required.
· Sharon Stone's maternal instincts were proven to be about as sharp as a Botox needle.
· Mad Men and Pushing Daisies would be happy to trade in their Emmys for few million more viewers.
· Speaking of Emmys, Survivor is already a front runner to nab next year's first-ever prize for Outstanding Performance by a Penis in a Reality Competition Show.
· Joe Biden may be bitter about SNL's ongoing snub, but perhaps there's consolation in Homer Simpson's support.

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