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    This Week In Tabloids: Angie's "So Lonely" & The Jersey Shore Kids Are Injecting Tanner

    What Famous Couple Will Spend Christmas with Their Third Partner?

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    The Sound Of Two Hands Clapping

    · Earlier today, Oprah emerged from her Oprahphagus long enough to welcome the world's fastest clapper onto her show. While we haven't scientifically verified this, we're also betting he's the world's fastest masturbator.
    · If you're wondering how one goes about getting kicked off the My Little Pony fan forum, here's a handy primer.
    · Since when does Indiana Jones have a bazooka? This probably means that The Beouf will be wielding a flamethrower.
    · Paris Hilton spent last night frenching Elisha Cuthbert in NYC. We can think of worse ways to spend a Tuesday night.
    · And lastly, looks like we just might have a baby J. Lo by this time tomorrow. Happy happy joy joy (or something).


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