· Treat yourself to one of the bricks from the facade of The Sopranos' legendary Satriale's Pork Store, then use it to smash your TV out of frustration that John from Cincinnati isn't watchable.
· Slate tries to figure out what happened to Pacino.
· Kirk Kerkorian is tired of paying $50k a month to raise Steve Bing's kid.
· Ellen Pompeo eats "rich and famous girls who are rich and famous for nothing" for lunch.
·Someone's really been hitting the weights.

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