Mar 12, 2007 05:04 PM
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Hollywood, 12:41 PM
Tue Feb 9
56 posts in the last 24 hours
There's really no winning with Christian television-watchdog groups: Write a catchy country-western ditty in which a paranoid cowboy express his fear that Jesus is involved in a little homosexual voyeurism, wind up on the wrong end of an outraged press release; try to dramatize the Creator as a Being who engages in heterosexual relations, ditto. Multichannel News reports that the Parents Television Council is protesting the season finale of The Sarah Silverman Program, angry that the lack of a la carte cable channel choices makes it all too easy for impressionable children to stumble upon blasphemous programming concerning a Jewish comedienne's post-coital rejection of "the sex-obsessed Deity." (Deadpans a Comedy Central spokesman in response: "We've never been terribly popular with the Parents Television Council.") A clip of the offending material is above; after the jump, we pass along the PTC's painstaking, blow-by-blow inventory of each sacrilegious story beat:
THE SARAH SILVERMAN PROGRAM * God and Sarah copulate. God: "You're a little monkey aren't you? Who made your monkey? Who made you?" Sarah: "You did."*Sarah rejects God the morning after their tryst.
God: "I had a really good time. A really, really good time."
Sarah: "Thanks. Me too."
God: "Come to Heaven with me today."
Sarah: "Today?"
God: "We can see the past and the future. We can fly. And I will introduce you to Thomas Jefferson."
Sarah: "Oh, awesome. I told my friend Natalie I would help her move, though."
God: "I could stop time."
Sarah: "That is so sweet. Oh your pants are over there. I mean not like I'm asking you to leave. I just mean if you can't see it from this angle of still being in my bed."
God: "Right. I should go."
Sarah: "Okay. Um. Alright. I guess I'll see you around sometime."
God: "Do you mean it? Or are you just saying that?"*Sarah seeks help from God.
Sarah: "I learned that people in wheelchairs are allowed to have marathons, which to me seems like cheating, but what are you going to say? And I learned that You exist, and that You're black. And I think that's amazing. I mean I'm not one of those people that are like 'Oh, God is black, is he going to steal the moon or something?' And finally I learned that giving is its own reward. Which is really kinda like saying there's no reward for giving. Unless you're really into the process of giving, and that's a reward to you. But how many people, I don't know. Can you meet me half way? You're kinda breaking my balls."
God: "Alright. Just one more time Sarah."
Lest you uncharitably suspect that at least part of the reason for the PTC's outrage is rooted in the fact that Silverman's God is black, they've covered that particular base by pairing the Sarah Silverman protest with one about the use of the n-bomb on a recent South Park episode, a move which sets up the Council as the nation's leading colorblind crusader against the morality-eroding practice of the forced bundling of heathen-programmed cable channels.
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