It's an incredible relief to discover that despite the many physical problems that David Blaine incurred in failing to set the coveted breath-holding record, the part of his brain regulating the release of vital attention-whoring neurochemicals was unaffected by his extended stay in that flooded hamster ball.

Ailments not covered in the above headline: Rashes and blisters from sunburn, oil-stripped skin, complete inability to enter a pet store without collapsing in a paroxysm of grief in the aquarium aisle.

• Blaine's Hands, Feet Return to Normal [ABC News]

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